Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Tears are Prayers

           After breaking down at church to a woman I barely knew she gave me some words of wisdom, "tears are prayers"... in my case prayers for help. Since my co-teacher has left my students and I have been left in the wake of inconsistency, exhaustion, and wondering what we did wrong to make her go. Last week was spent attempting to maintain the schedule without having the people to maintain it. I was trying to  manage 3 groups of students simultaneously and losing my voice in the process. I found out some things about myself... I am not as strong as I thought and nothing made me more disappointed in myself than yelling at students to get their attention.
          It has taken a lot to go back to work and face these kids that are so important to me knowing that in some way I have failed them. I came back with a promise to remain calm even in the midst of frustrating student behaviors (crawling on the floor, refusing to follow directions, hording food and destroying school materials). Class went better today. It is still not ideal, but all we can do is persevere until my new co-teacher arrives and pray that she catches on quickly. Who knew that growing would be so painful?
        In spite of all this there have been some glimmers of hope. The parents of my students have come together as a community to support our class until our new co-teacher arrives. One dad in particular simply astounded me with his gift of time. He works 12 hour shifts at a factory in town 6 days a week... what did he do on his day off? Read "It's Mine" to our class, stuffed all my BEE (Bring Everything Everyday) binders, and helped me with math. I've also had parents switch their schedules and take time off of work to come and help with the classroom. I couldn't be more grateful.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Breakthrough Week

        This week has made me proud to be a Kindergarten teacher. I watched as several of my struggling students made significant academic and behavioral breakthroughs. It started off with Miracle. Each month we learn 12 new sight words that our students are supposed to memorize in an effort to help them become better readers. When they learn their 12 sight words they earn an ice cream scoop on their sight word ice cream bowl. So far only 7 students have earned their first scoop. I hadn't tested Miracle yet but I wasn't expecting anything spectacular since she struggles with reading because of an eye problem and speech impediment. Against all odds, she spouted off every sight word on the first scoop list. We celebrated her success by stopping the whole class to give her a cheer and watch as she put her scoop up on the board.
         Miracle's unexpected success would have been enough for the week but then math meeting came and I again was surprised by the progress that is happening in my class. During math meeting I give jobs to each of the students, several of which involve leading a song. One job is to sing the date (Today is Sunday, November 11, 2012) and have the other students repeat it back. My Chinese student who is still learning English ended up with this job last week. I expected to help him sing his part for the other kids to follow, but he blew me away by singing the whole thing by himself. I was so proud of his courageous efforts to try a language even when he is not sure how it is supposed to sound I almost cried. Again my co-teacher and stopped the class to have Shifeng repeat his amazing performance.
       To top the week off I had two students finally take responsibility for their own actions and apologize for their previous behavior. During Writer's Workshop Dontez (a student who is habitually absent and tardy) told me he was sorry for taking my things (permanent marker that got all over his hands, pencils, left over change, etc) and that he was going to stop taking them. Then Jamari (a student who never can keep the same pencil for a day even with it tethered to his desk) raises his hand to tell me that he is not going to lose his stuff anymore by keeping it in his pencil pouch.
       Despite the long hours, pressure from administration, and the overwhelming nature of this work I wouldn't want to be anywhere else than teaching these kids, this year, at this school. Here's to more breakthroughs! Way to go God.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Things I Never Thought I Would Say to a Student

Some breaking election news from my Kindergarten classroom. We elected Barack Obama with vote of 18 and now for the real kicker... the runner up was Gary Johnson of the Libertarian Party.

After having some friends over for dinner this week I realized how ridiculous and hilarious my job is sometimes. These were some of the one liners we were laughing about:
Richard- Take the deli meat out of your pocket

T:How did your desk fall over?
S:Magic
T: So Magic pulled your desk over on you?

Stop digging a whole into the wall.

Take the diamond out of your mouth

Stop putting your hand in your mouth and flinging your spit on everyone.

T: What has gotten into you today? Why are you acting this way?
S: My tie is too tight

T:"Whose broad stripes and bright stars." What could our national anthem be talking about?
S: Zebras

S:Miss Scott there is garges all over the floor?
T: What?
S: GARGES
T: Can you use the word in another sentence?
S: You know for the garges can.
T: OH! Garbage.





Wednesday, October 24, 2012

I'd Be Glad To

        When I was growing up my mom and dad always emphasized having a good attitude whenever we were asked to do something ie. wash the dishes, sweep the floor, take care of a younger sibling (you get the point). This principle was especially emphasized when the task was something that I didn't like doing (vacuuming) and I remember getting more chores when I didn't say the key phrase "I'd be glad to". A lot of the times my emotions didn't follow my spoken words but it forced me to be conscious of how I was reacting to a situation. Why am I telling you all of this? Because I find myself using this same phrase a lot in my classroom. 
      Two students in particular often throw tantrums when they are not called on frequently enough or do not get what they want. It made my day today when one of them told me "I'd be glad to Miss Scott" after I asked him to stack the chairs. The other one has not come to that place yet. She is a student I have mentioned before... the infamous Diamond. Today's fits were over getting a check for making humming and singing noises while I was teaching, not getting the color of juice she wanted, and getting a check for not controlling her body while at her desk. Whenever she has a bad attitude I give her an opportunity to rewind the moment and try it again with some behavior coaching. This sometimes takes 3 or more attempts. I am looking forward to the day that she says I'd be glad to with a smile on her face. 
      As much as I tell my students to have an "I'd be glad to" attitude I often find myself whining or complaining in reaction to unforeseen events. I guess I need the opportunity to rewind my moments and try again too. This week my co-teacher was out of the classroom for the 4th time this year which meant 28 five year olds by myself with an ad-lib schedule for the day. I became stressed, anxious, and frustrated which turned into an adult melt down of questioning why I had gotten into teaching and bemoaning the upcoming days. However, Monday rolled around and thanks to the many prayers from my friends and family we had a great day. It turned out all of my anxiety was for nothing. 
My Dad gave me this Bible verse and it pretty much sums up my action plan for the rest of the year. Thanks Dad for still speaking promises over my life! 
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6 

Thursday, October 4, 2012

What do you want to be when you grow up?

If you ever need a good laugh or a smile ask a five year old what they want to be when they grow up and how they are going to get there. Some responses from the lunch dates I have been having with my kiddos....
Spider man... I need to get big
Batman.... I need a car and to be big (I tried to steer this conversation (unsuccessfully) towards the importance of protecting people and how we could do this in the classroom since this child happens to be a behavioral issue most days)
Cheerleader
Doctor
Diver (this one was one of my favorites)
Watch out world an entire generation of new superheroes is coming!

One more vignette from this week. Every morning I write a message to the students, usually talking about one of our Viking Virtues and someone in our class or in history who has showed this virtue. A couple of days ago I wrote a message about the reunification of East and West Germany because they had been reunited on the same day 60 years ago to talk about perseverance. Explaining these concepts to 5 year olds can be tricky but I had a spur of the moment thought that went pretty well. I told them what happened in Germany would be like if I cut the carpet that they sit on in half and one group of students would be with my co-teacher and one group would be with me. They would never get to see each other and they weren't allowed to be friends. I didn't know if what I said sank in until today during math meeting when we were talking about another war and one of  my students said " like when some scholars were on one side of the carpet and we were on the other side", which was followed up by another student who raised her hand and said if my brother was on the other side of the wall I would crawl over it to get to him. I love it when my kids really "get it".

On a different note two of the students I ate lunch with today talked about how their parents were in jail. My heart broke as they talked about a parent knocking on the door and beating up the mom. It wasn't just what they said... but how they said it, as if this were how normal life should look. I asked them if they were scared and they said yes. It is times like these that I pray that the comfort of Jesus and his protection is finding a place in their homes even if I can't talk with them about it at school. Please join me in praying that the families I work with would come to know Jesus and that the kids would be safe.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Overheard in CSU

       At my school each classroom is themed as a college or university to make our students aware of college at a young age and encourage them to see themselves there. My classroom is themed after Cleveland State University (CSU). This week I am teaching my students about the Viking (our mascot) Virtue of Courage. I was so proud today when I had a scholar, who is currently in the middle of a custody battle and appears to have sustained some type of emotional disturbance, wrote his name on his paper for the first time.
     This week I just wanted to regale you with some things I have caught my Vikings saying....
At a conversation I had during lunch:
Student 1: My grandma ran over a deer and it was dead
STudent 2: (continuing the conversation?) and my brother got a buzz lightyear for Christmas and we had to go clean out our closets to make room for the new toys

Me: How could I be a better teacher?
Student: Taller lockers. I am big and tall, see? (stands up to show me)

Student: Miss Scott can we snack up the chairs?
Me: snack them up or stack them up?
Student: snack them
Me: Yes you can STACK them.

    Now to the tougher part of my job. I have a student who has missed over 10 days of school (1/3 of the year so far). After talking with mom, I found out that she is the victim of domestic violence and currently being stalked by the father of her son, which was her excuse for not bringing him to school. I decided to call everyday at 7:00 am to make sure she was on the bus with her son. The student is in my lowest group and has yet to independently write his name. He came to school today, but we have a long road ahead. Please pray for the mom and the son.


Tuesday, September 11, 2012

I just can't stop thinking about the paint

9.11.12
     It all started when my friends Montre, Ryan, and Chaos (named changed) had to sit out of free choice at the end of our day last Friday because of hitting, bumping, or talking out turn more than once throughout the day. I went to the carpet where they were commiserating with each other to talk with them about how to change their behavior so they would get to participate in fun activities next time. I sat down with Montre first who was crying. I first employed what I am calling the (patent pending) Miss Scott breathing routine... talk 3 deep breaths, get a tissue, by the time you walk back I need you to tell me what is the matter in an adult voice. Next, I told Montre he was sitting out because he had pushed past his neighbors to get back to his desk. When I asked him why he did it he said that he was trying to get back to his desk because I had told all the students to get there quickly. I asked him if it was ever ok to push someone to follow another direction (ethical dilemma for a Kindergartner). He said no and I proceeded to ask him what he would do next time. He told he would "wait patiently" until all the other scholars (what our school calls students) to get back to their desks before he tried to get back to his. I told him I was proud that he had come up with what he needed to do next time, but that he was still going to have to sit out of painting (our free choice for the afternoon) because of his actions. I moved on to my next sobbing Kindergartner to discuss why he was sitting out of painting. About 3 minutes into my conversation with sobbing Kindergartner number 2 Montre crawls over to me looks up at me with bloodshot eyes and tear stained cheeks and says.... "I just can't stop thinking about that paint." with all the sincerity a 5 year can muster. I had to hold in the chuckle building inside so he didn't get the drift that I didn't take his emotions seriously. I told him he was just going to have to try and change how he was thinking.
         And so begins a new week just waiting for more great stories to unfold. I'm praying especially for ideas to reach a Chinese student I have who speaks almost zero English and is incredibly active. I have been unsuccessful so far in keeping his attention for an entire lesson.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

If you plan on shopping at JC Penney in the next month check this out:


Dear friends,
When you shop at jcpenney stores this month, you will be able to round up your purchase price to the nearest dollar at the register-and jcpenney will donate the extra change to Teach For America! We're so excited about this new opportunity and hope you will join us by shopping and spreading the word to as many people as possible.

Just click the photo below, then click on "SHARE" to post it to your Facebook news feed. It's that simple!

Small change really can make a big difference so let's make the most of this back-to-school shopping season. Thank you for helping us spread the word and encouraging your friends and colleagues to act in support of our work to expand educational opportunity.
See you at jcpenney!



Monday, September 3, 2012

September 3, 2012
                                                 A Letter to My Former Students
Dear Upward Bound students-
        I look back at my years tutoring, directing and teaching you fondly but now with a twinge of regret. I'm sorry I tried so hard to get you to like me and be my friends rather than be your teacher. I'm sorry I didn't make my expectations clear and your pathways to achieve them clearer. I'm sorry for the times I didn't understand all the difficulties you had going on at home and I hope you have learned to overcome them.  I know that you learned, but I also know that you could have learned so much more if I had known what I do now, then. My promise to you is that I will keep striving to become a better teacher.
Sincerely,
Natalie Scott

The benefit of hindsight is that it is 20/20. In the few years I have had teaching I feel that I have learned so much, which is wonderful and terrible. I sincerely hope that as I was learning I didn't permanently damage any student's learning. However, the only way to get better is to keep practicing and implementing feedback from my more experienced counterparts.

Now on to a new story from thew week:
        The past 3 weeks school has been in session I have had several run ins with a particular student on the subject of controlling her tongue. I will call her Diamond for the sake of the story. The first time she spoke out of turn I gave her a check, then another, when she got the third and had to move to yellow on the behavior tracker she started to cry which mellowed into a pout for the rest of the day. Seeing that mere checks weren't the way to change her behavior I tried to explain to Diamond how disrespectful it was to speak during another scholar's turn or when the teacher was talking since one of our core virtues was respect and I had been highlighting it in our community meetings each day. This only produced more tears and pouting. Next, I tried snagging her in the morning while she was going to her locker and talking to her about how she was a leader in the class and that everyone would do whatever she did. (Diamond just didn't realize what a climate changer she was.... check out Pastor Josh's sermon http://www.elimgospel.net/media.php?pageID=146)  I thought that talk would turn the tide but Diamond was swiftly back at talking at inappropriate times giving her opinion whenever she felt like it. Last Friday, Diamond got to red on the behavior tracker before half the day was over and she was a melting, pouting, crying puddle at her desk. I decided to try a different tactic. I asked her why she wasn't allowed to talk when others were talking and she whimpered that she would get a check. I wanted her to see past the checks to why it was disruptive to her and those around her so I decided to make her the teacher and I would pretend to be her as a student. She attempted to teach the lesson and I talked when I wasn't supposed to. Diamond gave me a check to which I replied with crying, pouting, and entirely over dramatized carrying on. Diamond started to smile and I asked her about how much teaching she was able to accomplish while I was crying. I think she started to see how her actions impacted those around her. I would love to say by the end of the day Diamond spoke and kept quiet when she was supposed to, however, she only made it back to yellow by the end of the day. Apparently, this is one of those times when I will have just have to keep using my imagination for creative ways to teach controlling one's tongue.
SUGGESTIONS PLEASE!

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

8/22/12
      You know how some people test the water of a pool to make sure it is the right temperature? I've never been one of those people. And once again I've found myself cannon balling into the water... this time the water is working in downtown Cleveland at a charter school with all minority and low income students (and not just any students either... Kindergartners). I see this blog as an opportunity to share the great challenges and growth I have already begun to encounter as I serve this population.I also see it as a chance to reflect, which I don't make a lot of time for these days. 
        Now on to the interesting stories. Kindergartners are an interesting breed... on the one hand they pick their noses, put their hands in their mouths, and need help with everything from zipping up pants to tucking in shirts. On the other hand they write their names for the first time in your presence, learn how to read, and truly do say the darndest things. So with that I will recount some of the moments so far that have made me smile, cry, or just shake my head. 

SMILE MOMENTS:
-me: What month is it? 
 students: Tuesday
-me: What number comes before thirteen? 
 student: two teen? 
-me: What words starts with the L sound
 students: alligator pronounced "ligator"
-I found out that this week that "use it" means they have to go to the bathroom 
-having a conversation with one of my louder students about being a leader and watching her demeanor change in class

CRY MOMENTS:
-finding out one of my kindergartners might have herpes
-custody battles 
-working 60+ hours a week and still not feeling like everything that needs to be done is done

SHAKING MY HEAD MOMENTS:
-one of my favorite trouble makers started off the year evading discipline from me and other teachers by climbing underneath desks. I am happy to report their have been no desk incidents this week. 
-a new student vomits in my classroom twice. We call to have her get picked up and find out that not only do we not have any contact information for the parents, but we don't even know the student's last name... and being a Kindergartner she can't write it for us. 
-my roster has changed over 10 times since the beginning of school
-a mom walked in during the middle of class today to have a discussion about the reading backpacks we sent home
-my co-teacher left sick in the afternoon leaving me with 30 restless students to look after for the rest of the day, thank God for help from the other staff.